Tuesday, May 26, 2009

This weekend we were invited to be the mystery guests at something called the Ashland Secret Society Dinner. Basically for the last 18 years a group of friends has been having a monthly dinner, to which a mystery couple is invited. Does it say something that it’s taken 18 years for them to get to us? 

Anyway, the host decides how to introduce the guests and for us he asked that we write down some odd things in the manner or two-truths-and-a-lie. But as a twist, he wanted them all to be true. Then hidden on a balcony above the living room where the group was gathered, Scott and I had to read our lists:

For my 40th birthday week I went to a monastery for silent seclusion.
I have Bill Gates’ comb in my desk drawer.
One Halloween I spent the night in a 500-year old Scottish castle. 
After breakfast of toast and tequila, I jumped of the I-5 Bridge into Lake Shasta (for those who have never seen this, it’s like jumping off a skyscraper)

By not going to seminary, I have broken a 300-year ancestral streak of Lutheran Pastors.
My mother and stepfather, a nurse and a doctor, ignored the fact that I had a broken leg for a week. 
I have walked deep into the cave where Zeus is said to have been reared.
I once thought I was going on a standard advertising Booze Cruise on Lake Washington in Seattle and found myself with Steve Forbes on the Forbes Yacht in all-too-casual clothing.

Once the group had voted on what was true we were allowed to come down, show ourselves and reveal that all the statements were true. Word to the wise: don’t fall for this trap. Once you list anything remotely odd that you’ve done everyone expects you to be supremely interesting and engaging. Fortunately, Scott shines at this kind of thing (while I wash down beta blockers and pretend to be comfortable as the center of attention). There’s a reason I’m a writer—and it mostly involves being alone in a room…


Jennie Englund said...

OMG! I know A.S.S.!!! (I've been trying to get invited to one of those dinners for 7 years and 8 months.

I think I know how you got, there, too!

Was it wildly fabulous?

Was there pesto?

PurpleClover said...

You are too funny! "while I wash down beta blockers and pretend to be comfortable as the center of attention" OMG.

You are totally interesting. I'm sure just your stories alone from when you did those three or four things is enough to keep people occupied all night. :D

Hardygirl said...

Wow! And you didn't even have to mention the pickled baby!

I think I want to start a secret society.


Suzanne Casamento said...

I'd like to learn more about Halloween in the 500 year old castle. Not to mention jumping off that bridge. I once jumped off a cliff and actually tried to flap my wings.

Did you?

Anonymous said...

You don't give yourself enough credit--fascinating, talented AND generous. (How can I get some betablockers? :))

Teri (Hall)

Little Ms J said...

Hm... The words "secret society" immediately took me to Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise in Eyes Wide Shut. I imagined you and hubby hiding behind the curtains on the balcony overlooking the main floor with masked topless sluts cavorting around you. And then someone asked if they had pesto and it totally ruined it for me.

You are totally interesting. I would suck at that game and it would take me another 17 years to be invited back.

Suzanne Young said...

Just laughed all over the place here! hahaah. And really? Things like this exist? And how big is your town that it took 18 YEARS!!?? hahaha

Christy Raedeke said...

Jennie - I'm sure your number will be up soon! I mean, there aren't that many people left in Ashland! You'll be so much better at it than I was.

PC - No, those ofour things really are the xtent of my interestingness. That's all I got...

Suzanne C - I did flap, but more out of holy shit! terror than any attempt to fly. It was a bad, bad idea. I didn't factor in how far down in the water you go when you jump off something that high.

Teri - I'll hook you up when I see you in June!

Little Miss J, you are killing me. Actually having naked chicks walking aorund would have been fine with me if it shifted the focus! I draw the line at being blindfolder, though.

Suz, yes it really exists! You should start one in Portland with writer friends and invite other writer friends from out of town (ahem) to be mystery guests!

Katie said...

This was so cool! And I thought yours were way more fascinating than your hubby's (but don't tell him!)