Thursday, September 18, 2008

Dusk

I’ve always been suspicious of dusk, a deeply unsettling time of day. When the light fades, diurnal animals settle in but nocturnal animals don’t become active until later so there’s an eerie quietness. It feels as if energy is suspended and life is waiting for the scale to tip, for darkness to fall.

To me, Autumn is the seasonal equivalent of dusk. This time of year I always become agitated in the same deep, primal way that dusk affects me. Most people love Fall; the colors, the crisp air, the interesting light…blah blah blah. I don’t get it.

I put my lamps on electric timers that flick the light on in late afternoon so that I never have to deal with the murky light of dusk, but there’s no electric timer equivalent to help me get through Autumn. I just have to wait it out.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

You must have inherited that directly from me! I always thought it was because I spent 53 years in school, as a student, then a teacher. But after seven years of retirement, I still get the rather sad, doomsday feeling this time of year. I eat too much and seem to get lethargic as if ready to begin hibernation. The bright primary colors of Autumn do not give me the celebratory feelings I get from the pastels of Spring. I totally understand!
Love, Mom

Anonymous said...

That's really bizarre. I've never met anyone who doesn't like fall. But then again, I've never met anyone like you! CDG

Anonymous said...

Autumn means I'm finally allowed to play inside. A writer-girl's favorite thing to do.

Time to go deep-Astrid.

Marcia

Cathy Gersich said...

That makes two of us who inherited this from you Mom! I have all the lights on timers, fight with my desire to nap everyday at 4 and am eating like I'm preparing to hibernate! Fall sucks...

Anonymous said...

I have to offer a counterpoint to my esteemed friend and colleague, Ms. Raedeke. For me, 'twilight' has a very different feel. Twilight signals the closing of the day; you're not responsible for accomplishing anything further, but you still have several hours which are your own, to do with as you will. This eerie absence of energy my friends speaks of is simply potential energy -- what do you want to with the rest of your evening? Bike downtown for ice-cream? Watch a few worthless sitcoms? Allow a brilliant idea for tomorrow to pop into your head? This deliciously fleeting time is pregnant with possibility.

It was dusk when I experienced what I'm pretty sure was 'grace'. My son was four months old; the gloaming half light fell across some folded laundry on my neatly made bed, and across my son's perfect sleeping face and I felt a frozen moment of perfection that I can still conjure up to this day. Neither daylight nor lamplight could have held it just so.

Counterpoint offered. J.I.

Christy Raedeke said...

Who gets to be Jane Curtain and who has to be Dan Akroyd? I know I should enjoy Fall/Dusk; the cooler temperatures, the quiet, the opportunity to use the word "gloaming", etc. But I fear I'll have to stay on the minority side of this argument.

Anonymous said...

I, like the true Pro-choice person that I am, can see both sides of the twilight issue. And I love the fact that you can both percieve the issue completely differently and still be great friends. Here's to democracy, with or without lipstick.

Kelly Hudgins said...

I split my cards here. I'm on your side re dusk. It's the perfect metaphor for the amount of time I hate having on my hands: too much for a tiny task and not enough to begin anything of substance. I'm always bone tired, but it's too late to nap. If I drink coffee, I'll have trouble sleeping. Dusk has nothing to recommend it.

Fall, on the other hand, is pure joy for me. Not only does it follow The Season of Hell, but it means gathering and preparing and nesting.

BTW, I've tagged you for a ridiculous meme. Sorry